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05/05/2012 by Siddiqui Fayesal

Everyday is a tiny morose reminder to where our world is going. Yeah, of course, there are the good things like a lot more charity, a lot more education, a lot more “awareness” and blah blah. Well there are the good things and then there are the “REAL” things. Real things that are so subtle that we need to look real hard for them. Like I already mentioned in a couple of posts, Truth is an ugly naked monster. No one wants to look at it. And what happens when you’re not looking at it? Its attack takes you by surprise.

The End.

It’s too late to correct our wrongs, I would feel. But that is probably the overtly pessimistic and nihilistic side of me speaking. The other, less exuberant and mellow, side speaks softly about so much not done. It speaks about the vast continent of goodness still left, waiting to be distributed to counter the evil. Every time I see a little truth and realism being ignored I walk a little bit ahead to find some patience waiting for its turn to do its magic. Every time I see a little selfishness playing around I see that forgiveness is just behind it; running at full strength, still a little behind, but catching up…swiftly!

There is still a little good in the world. I hope. If i’m wrong then we surely are doomed. There is still a little integrity and honesty somewhere within our soul. If i’m wrong then we’re never going to make it back to being human beings.

I sat for my Constitution of India paper today for my LLB and was stunned to find the strength of my belief waver. My peers were cheating!

Now, normally this doesn’t affect me in a way that I keep harping upon it even after 4-5 hours of witnessing the abysmally dishonest behaviour of the so called future of my country. Not when I was in class 8 or something. Not when I was sitting for a test in school.

This was beyond graduation. This was beyond excuse.

Everyone of us was at least 23. The irony of the situation was laughing in my face. We’re making a big deal about a degree and then refuse to study for it! Why? I have my Final C.A and LLB and even then I could give 7 complete days to this paper. And I study from a proper textbook! Not from paper solutions and not from an author who caters only to students who realise they want to get a law degree a night before the exam.

I’m not saying i’m doing someone a favour. Oh yeah wait a minute. Actually I am doing a favour to some one! To my self isn’t it? That is the least one can do, right? I don’t understand how long can we keep lying to our self. I don’t understand the reason of the satisfaction we feel when we wake up each morning, look in the mirror and see ourselves!

Who are we looking for? You look in the mirror and you see a cheater who was asking for a 2 mark question from the unknown person sitting besides him/her! I know its worth only 2 marks. To me, its worth hard work and integrity! But are you liking what you see in the mirror? Are you sure you earned that degree that you flaunt?

Yeah I know i get a lot of flak about ignoring the real time situation of ANY scenario. The best reply I get is something like this:

ME: But what is the use of getting a law degree if you copy?
THEM: A degree! Duh!

This is funny in such a dark way!

I swear studying from a standard book 9-10 days worth of studies was more than enough to be able to tackle the paper. That was what it was worth! Now 4 times that is the total time you need to take out Sem II with aplomb!

But Nooooooo. We want the easier way out.
Ok take easier way out. Study from Past papers.
Noooooooo we want easiest way out.
Well I don’t know about that.
We know! We’ll copy. Yay!

If this wasn’t the end of it wait for the cream. The goddammed examiner (I hope he was just a shitty useless student who copied his way through college) was letting them do it! The good old professor-student relationship has been lost forever. Its the end of an era now. The only kind of relationship I see is the illicit ones where the student is sleeping with the teacher. I don’t believe in that too but i have my doubts now.

It hurts! When a person you’re brought up to respect because he has a title of your teacher, your master, your leader! Age doesn’t matter then, does it? The Chinese and the Japanese are way too good at this. Their definition of discipline is radical and amazing. At least it was.

Help Yourself!

I’ve got another couple of papers due. I’m making my move soon if it happens again.

I’ll sock him in the face and push the heel of my boots in his jaw and make him say sorry!

I wish!

You wonder what does the caption mean? Its the sound that a radar makes when it senses an unknown object in its path. That unknown object is our heart speaking to us… And we’re ignoring it. Being true to your self is the only thing I ask for! No drama. No crap!

Just you and your ideals!

Siddiqui F.

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