17/08/2012 by Siddiqui Fayesal
For anyone who has read my profile page or read certain posts will know I’m doing my CA. Chartered Accountancy. It’s a finance and taxation based profession which is pretty highly rated, or so I’d like to think. Well, Our ICAI (Institute of Chartered Accountancy of India) is pretty highly rated and known for furnishing top class Chartered Accountants over the past many years. This too I’d like to think is true or else my past few years’ worth endeavour would go to a total waste. We are known for swallowing laws based on taxation and corporate finances and excel where the tech savvy MBA fail. Ratan Tata has allegedly once said, and I quote from memory, “I need an MBA to run my business but a CA to show the MBA how to run my business”. So all in all I took a pretty clinically accurate decision when I decided to sit for these exams and pursue a life of dissecting Balance Sheets and snooping around looking for frauds and tell tale signs for tax evasions and the likes.
Technically the course duration is around 4-5 years which includes around 3 years of on hand training where you work under a practicing CA. I started my lame journey in the year 2005. I’m still not a CA. I wasted around 4 years on the second level failing by margins of 3 to 9 marks. I’m not here to lament though. And even if I was it’ll be very difficult for me to explain to a person not accustomed to a regular CA student why is it so difficult to attain a mere 50%. Difficult for me to explain and difficult for another to accept. So let’s not get into that.
We’ll talk about the structure of the system within which it operates.
CA has 3 levels. Each level tends to check the theoretical and practical knowledge of subjects studied.
Level 1(erstwhile Foundation Course and Professional Education-1, now called CPT) is made up of 4 subjects.
Level 2 (previously known as Inter level then called Professional Education-2 and then Professional Competency Course. Now at present its knows as IPCC, Integrated Professional Competency Course) is made up of 6, divided into 2 different groups of 3 each.
Level 3 (final level. No stupid nomenclature here) comprises of 8 subjects segregated into groups of 4 each.
Passing criteria is the same irrespective of the level. Minimum 40 per paper; total should be 50%. So, technically it comes down to half.
The mind numbing and boring part is over. The selfish bantering is about to begin.
When I said about taking a clinically accurate decision about doing this mentally decapitating journey?
Well, I blatantly lied. The germ of the idea was sown by my father. He never forced. By God, he’s such an understanding man that he’d not bat an eyelid if I walked up to him and said, “Dad, I’m done. I’ve finally decided after 25 years of existence that I want to play the piano at a cafe instead of doing CA”. Forget about batting an eyelid. He’ll probably jump up with glee and say, “Good for you boy“. The thing is my dad feels a bit guilty for “mentioning” CA. He feels that he’s bought it all down on me. The ruined nights, the annihilated social life, the sacrificing of my writing dreams, the works!
He shouldn’t be guilty though. The idea was his. The plan, mine. I never forced. He just mentioned. I took him too darn seriously and told myself: This you got to do, Siddiqui! Sigh! I wonder why I do that?
I know by now everyone of the readers (I have a few…) would believe with a rather disarming ease that this Siddiqui is a moron and a certified loser. But wait my dear. Aragorn says that there is always Hope. And if there is Hope enough to win against an army of Urukhais then surely this Siddiqui might, just might, be able to able to worm himself out of this unbelievable shot hole of a place that he calls his head. Seriously, I wonder where I go wrong. Having tried every permutation and combination I can say with conviction that my law papers are corrected by physicians, my audit papers by farmers and my tax papers by history professors.
Its like going back to junior college and scoring lower marks in English that my not-so-capable class mates! He who couldn’t string 3 words together to make coherent sense gets an 80 and he who left the “oh-so-easy-paper-because-it-was-class-4-types” gets a 50!
I’m proud of my spoken English to some extent! Yes, I make spelling errors; sometimes glaring and obvious grammatical mistakes but I’m pretty above average…and, boy, can I speak! But NO! My English paper was corrected by a Moron! But this isn’t about my college. Its not even about my graduation exams. This is about my bloody profession and what I’ve done to it. I know what they’ll say. They’ll say that I didn’t study enough, Or, that I didn’t study smart (this pisses me off all the way to my limits!). Now, how do I impress upon these imbeciles that there is no “Question Set” or “Papers” that can give me a sure shot chance of clearance.
So, all I can do is listen to these buffoons give me advice and walk away telling myself, “Control yourself, Siddiqui they’re trying to help”.
I just need to try not to hack ’em dead!