Love? Yeah right!


20/08/2012 by Siddiqui Fayesal

I’ve noticed a certain trend in my writing lately. A friend pointed it out too. I usually am cynical and aloof. Recently my writing has turned around a little and have started thawing. Or, at least, moving towards the romantic from the dark and dreary. There was never a concious decision for this unforseen shift in paradigm. Neither is it because I’ve recently fallen for a dame.

I guess the lovey-dovey genre is such that every one associates himself/herself with it depending upon their understanding of the element that we so deprecatingly call romantic. Cheap bollywood movies with their over the top love stories and the incessant plague of Greeting card companies vouching to know us better than ourselves have made us look down on the very word “Love”. Mind you, I’m talking about the LOVE that is much abused by youngsters of today. I’m talking about the kind of love that solely exists between bedsheets; I’m talking about love that is broken like a dry twig. One deft movement of a finger and it breaks without restrain. The love that is easily found and lost even more readily. Tears follow, no doubt. But one can easily gauge the depth of so called love if it revolves around only flashy dancing floors, or loud sex, or expensive rides.

Sometimes love fakes too. It unravels itself slowly; exfoliating into nothingness. Every lover believes his true love is his present muse. One doesn’t identify with the possibility of misreading the signs. We all know how love has to grow with us. But we ignore the jabs that we feel deep within our conscience telling us that this isn’t going to work. We, instead of being rational and realistic become moppy and silly.

We all do this. Love is meant to do this to us. I’d go as far as actually saying that if it does not then it’s not love. If your muse doesn’t drive you crazy as a bat over her then it’s difficult to identify where to place those feelings. If it doesn’t make you travel 3 hours in a crowded train standing upright the whole journey just to meet her for another 3 hours then it might as well be something less potent.

But then such true stories are not splashed across the windshield of the narrow minded, love thirsty kids I see today. Now, it’s a different story. Now love is found in the deep cleavage of the sexy bartender, or, maybe, in the figure hugging corset of your friend’s date! When love is found so easily it is not surprising that we see youngsters losing patience with such alacrity like it is their birthright. A little against their wishes and we have a stoned guy who “lost it all” because he had a breakup. It lasts not more than a few days.

It is for this reason not surprising to find kids in their low rise denim pants ranting like an all knowing Rishi about Love being nothing but a farce. After all, post enlightenment everything that makes one want NOT to die is something called Moh and Maya (mirage) and hence not to be fallen for. I’m sorry to see how things are now. There is no strength and passion in the lives of men and women. They easily get offended over the most miserably tiny issue and suddenly find themselves that there exists “irreconcilable differences” and, wham, a marriage spanning 10s of years breaks up!

For reasons like a cheating partner??? No I’m not belittling cheating, which is pathetic. By God I’d do something terrible to both of them. But talk about the reasons why. I know at times there are acceptable, mind you not justified, but acceptable, reasons as to why a partner cheats. But this happening to a couple who were married for a period long enough to have a couple of kids??? Cheating is still cheating maatey! Take the very recent so-much-in-love-couple Pattinson and Stewart of the Twilight Saga fame! I wish I could just ask the lady why (I am explicitly taking all the news at face value. One never knows what the truth is).  If reports are to be believed then she was caught with a married man. But, like I said, too early in their lives so let ‘s leave them alone.

Talk about Ol’ Arnie and his marriage of 25 years! He fathered a child at the same time when his wife was pregnant with their fourth child! Wow! Ah! I really don’t know what to make of it. A drunken night? A passionate mistake? I know i’m probably taking the wrong examples, you know, from Hollywood and stuff, where this keeps happening. I know this is not a fair subset of the universe. I know that the class (of people in the showbiz) is different from people who walk by me everyday on the streets.

But are they really that different? Agreed, they have fast life revolving around easy temptation but at the end of the day they are the same. Men and women. Humans. Even they need a shoulder to weep at when they get fired from their job. They, too, need a someone to whom they’d want to return home to! They too hurt. They too bleed. Then why? What causes people to back stab the one person they apparently loved and probably promised that they’d stay true. I can understand divorces based on reasons which hold water. Perhaps some marriages are better off ending in a separation rather than to go through the rigmarole of a painful dawn every day of your life. Some people say that marriages have nothing to do with love. I beg to differ. Yes, there are marriages which really have no love (I have seen enough) but I’d rather that be the exception than the rule.

Love has been used and abused so much in every possible permutation and combination that it sounds fake now when you say it to yourself. The world, where love is a cheap commodity has indeed worsened now.

Love? For heaven’s sake let us give it another name so that further blasphemy is weeded out before it is too late.

Siddiqui F.

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